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Important information for relatives

How do children experience depression and mania?

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    For me, a psychosis is (as if)...
  • "In the day-to-day routine, we siblings regulated everything alone during the difficult times, which was then occasionally a very grand feeling. My sister was better at merely going deaf. I did my best to keep my mother in a good mood, and time and again tried to strike up a conversation with her. Sometimes I could even cause the phases to be delayed. At the end, though, there was always the deep powerlessness due to the depression. That was unfathomably gruesome. My father plunged himself into his work, which had always functioned well. He stood by her and was at the same time fully overtaxed. Later on we were also able to occasionally speak about the situation."
  • "My mother died when I was twelve-years-old. I knew that she had taken her own life, but I was merely told something else. There was only a big question mark over the entire matter. Only much later I was told the truth by a friend. It is the worst one can do, to lie to children, and it is wrong to try to spare them. That was a great burden for me my whole life long."
  • "The worst for me was to realise that there is a person whom one knows and likes, and during these phases he is somebody completely different."
  • "Since I have been able to think, I have always tried to comfort my mother more than my mother has comforted me. .....I sometimes treated her like a small child, 'Now listen to me, you see that completely wrong, that is not at all as you believe it to be...., now sit down first and take your pills.'"
  • "My feelings for my mother were very contradictory. There was such a mixture of harm and bewilderment: It cannot be possible that somebody can change so extensively in only a week. And then there was sometimes also a full denial, so that one is glad not to have to see her at times, like when she spent two hours upstairs in bed."
  • "At the end, one has no further wishes than that she should go into hospital, because it is impossible to put up with anymore. And I can no longer take the responsibility for this, or I don't want to have this responsibility at all. I cannot pay attention to my mother 24 hours a day. I cannot be responsible for her if she does something to herself."

(Source: T. Bock, StimmenReich, Balance – Buch und Medien Verlag, Germany)

 

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