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Assistance for everyday life

Strengthen your self-confidence

”A small amount of self-confidence leads us to consider much of what others say or do to be evidence for our insufficiencies.”

"Self-confidence" is one of the central topics for individuals with psychoses or bipolar disorders. On the one hand, self-confidence can be reduced through the experiences associated with a psychosis. On the other hand, however, those afflicted with psychoses, have long given themselves no credit for anything, are reserved and, because of their experiences in life, have the feeling that they are inferior. Significant thereby is evidently the way and manner in which the persons affected perceive their experiences in social relationships. In experiences with others, they usually feel powerless and inferior, they are ashamed and fearful that others are aware of their weaknesses.

Causes for a small amount of self-confidence

bildNobody is born with a small amount of self-confidence. If we credit ourselves with nothing, then simply because we have made experiences from our youth onward, which have made us believe that something is wrong with us and that we are therefore inferior. These experiences emerged in our early years, in which we were advised, primarily by adults, but also by those of the same age group, who, both consciously and unconsciously, constantly made us aware of our errors and weaknesses and have punished us with words and rejecting behaviour if we did not act as they had demanded from us.

If one has such experiences over long periods of time, one then begins to automatically consider oneself more critically or to criticize oneself in all situations. One labels oneself with such unsightly or terrible characterisations as being a dullard, an idiot, a failure and a coward or even characterises oneself as being stupid, ugly and weak.

If you want to continue to destroy your self-confidence further, then here is the way

  • Always think badly of yourself,
  • be satisfied with everything that happens to you and accept all injustices,
  • contradicting others immediately, if they make you a compliment or praise you,
  • always find fault with yourself.

If you want to win back or strengthen your self-confidence, start now with following steps

  • Think of yourself positively.
  • Regardless of what you have done, you have given it your best.
    If you feel yourself unjustly treated, talk it over soon, but remain quiet and determinate. In this way your head will remain free from negative thoughts and misunderstandings will clarify themselves.
  • Praise yourself; if you have accomplished something, say to yourself, "That was really well done!" If others praise you, thank them and enjoy it.
  • Give your best every day. Criticism is important, however, it should lead to one’s desire to make a change.

Here, a few other useful tips:

  • Consciously be aware of your talents. Prepare a list with those characteristics and behaviours which you like in yourself.
  • Consciously be aware of your negative feelings. Learn to control these. Consider the fact that losing once is not always losing.
  • Slowly attempt to build up social relationships with other people and thereby regain your self-confidence step by step.
  • In the evening, while in bed, review your day and actively call your attention to that which had been successful for you, and which was positive for you. Praise yourself for your progress.
  • If your lacking self-confidence is associated with lower social capabilities, think about whether or not you would like to carry out a social competency training (SCT) programme.
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